Advice for dating a man with a teenage daughter?

My boyfriend introduced me to his 15 year old daughter last night. I wasn't comfortable at first but we ended up getting along pretty well. She lives with her mother and I'm not sure how often she will want to see me. I don't want to try too hard, and not enough....any advice?Advice for dating a man with a teenage daughter?
First of all totally ignore what Justin has written. He's no idea how to behave.


It can be very difficult when starting a new relationship which involves your new partners children.


I was in that situation and eventually worked out that you have to treat the kids as new friends, don't patronise nor underestimate their intelligence.


Make it clear that you are someone to whom they can run to for advice and support.


Some teenage girls may talk to a ';non parent'; when they won't talk to or feel comfortable talking to their parents.


Build a relationship between you, your partner %26amp; his daughter where each of you is aware that there are things you will not tell the other if it is said in confidence.


Make her feel that you are an addition to her life and not a replacement for her mum.


If you can build a relationship in which she can trust you and enjoy life you'll get along just fine.


Most importantly try and get her to tell you if she is upset about you and her dad being together. Ask her what it is that she is worried about and keep reassuring her about you not being a replacement for her mother but a new found friend.


A very close friends daughters were very upset about one thing one time and i asked what it was.


She didn't talk to them about her new man staying over night and the thing was, they weren't upset about their mum having a new man but the fact that they were not asked or told about him staying over.


They said all they would have liked is for their mum to sit down and ask them if they had any problems with him staying.


So don't assume that at 15 she is not adult enough to understand what is going on.


Tell her what you feel for her dad and ask her about what she feels uncomfortable with.Advice for dating a man with a teenage daughter?
I can totally understand. The best thing you can do is show interest, concern, and support.Let her be the one to take the next step.She open up as much as she's ready and willing to.You'll know when you can make a step instead of her.She'll come to you. let it happen.when she's totally comfortable w/ you you'll know.good luck
My advice is don't push. Be friendly and sincere. If you would like to spend time with her, offer, but don't be shocked if she doesn't take you up on your offer. Let your boyfriend take the lead on discipline, grades, etc. NEVER talk about her mother in a negative way. Treat her with respect and she will do the same.





Best of luck!
Go with the flow and dont try to rush things - she may be thinking the same about you.
My husband has a 15 year old daughter. She is a wonderful girl but a pain in the backside. When her mother first started letting her come to see her dad, she did everything in her power to make me feel like a piece of sh*t for being with her dad. I gave up, I didn't think she was going to like me. Maybe she doesn't but a year later she is warming up. Just take it easy. Cook for her, be nice to her and have an open ear if she ever wants to talk. It may not always be easy, because men with little girls are wrapped around that child's little finger. Try to avoid with your new boyfriend the arguments that kids can cause and understand in your mind that kids want the parents to be together and you are an intruder. sad but true. Just do what you can and hope that your BF supports you and sets limitations on what his daughter can/cant do. Structure is good, but dont try to hard, it will push her in the opposite direction. Good luck
are you sure?
She's 15. Try telling her exactly what you told us. ';I don't want to try too hard and make you think I'm a dork, but I do want you to get to know me. What do you think?';





Make sure that your boyfriend understands your unique awkward position, he can help you a lot by explaining more clearly what his parental rights are, how often you'll be seeing her as part of his life, etc.
I have been in this situation. The best thing is to not take anything too seriously. If you and her father get very serious (engaged, or living together) you both need to set ground rules. If you have any questions or issues with the situation you need to bring them to your partner, in private, so you two can resolve it.


Also, I agree with others in not trying too hard. This is not a popularity contest, do not try to buy her acceptance or she will begin always expecting it. If you are serious about your partner then SLOWLY begin forming an emotional base with her. If you begin too fast or try to establish a relationship through spending money not time together then she will likely manipulate you for the most she can receive from you, because that is what teenagers do!


Last tip--Never overreact, most issues with teenagers are temporary.
Understand she'll never see you as a parental figure. I am a stepmom, so I know from experience. I would wait until she's 18 to get married. You'll save yourself a lot of grief that way. Let your husband be the parent. If she was little, I'd say you do some of the disciplining when you are married, but since she's a teenager, that's not a good idea. Also, for a time, you will be in the back seat until she's 18. While he won't intend for things to be that way, truth is, she was there first, and is his primary responsibility.
just be yourself. teenagers can sniff out a fake in an instant.
Just be friendly to her. Give her space if you can see she's a bit uncomfortable or shy, and try to talk to her but don't be too nosey. My dad's girlfriend just talked to me so I got to know her better and she's really nice.
she hates you dont try to be friends and dont fight the daughter will win just stay in the shadows