Wednesday, August 18, 2010

Teenage girls and/or their Moms, PLEASE I need advice!?

My 16year old daughter has a good friend whose boyfriend gets physical with her, I even suspect he hits her. I've tried talking to her,especially about it not being her fauly, that she is a strong woman who is not alone, empowering stuff.





The problem is her mother believes she gets what she deserves becuse she ';settled'; or this boy. I feel vert responsible for this young lady's safety and am not sure what I must do morally, ethically and legally. Can any one of you PLEASE help me? Or offer me any sound advice. I would hate for this young lady to grow up being battered and thinking it is OK. I would hate for this young man to grow up thinking it is OK to hit woman. I have seen some of the most amazing and strong woman crumble to a pile of rubble at the hands of an abbusive relationship...I would hate to be in the position to help and do nothing. But what do I do when this is a child with a mother that seems not to care? Please I am desperate for help.Teenage girls and/or their Moms, PLEASE I need advice!?
I am abused the best thing you can do is sit her down and tell her she doesn't deserve this, help her realize how many better boys are out there, and that she just doesn't need to take that kind of treatment. And then help her get out of the relationship, be there all the time so that she realizes she's losing one person but gaining another. No matter what don't leave her.Teenage girls and/or their Moms, PLEASE I need advice!?
I would call the police on this boy. If her own mother won't protect her and she won't leave him then the only way that he is going to learn that it's wrong is by sitting in jail for it. good luck and God bless.
at 16 years old would that be neglect by the mother if she is allowing her child to be abused? Even if it is a boyfriend she still is responsible for her daughter ????? help her if you can. good luck
I have twin girls 18 and I can tell you that I brought my girls up to expect a man to respect her and they have no problem handling anyone that doesn't,but if this girl hasn't it is hard to know what to do.I think I would keep talking to her and building up her self esteem because with a mother like you say she has that for sure is one thing she never taught her.16 though to me it would be an illegal act and if you witness it you could probably have him arrested.You didn't say how old he is,if he's is a minor,I would find out who his parents were and check them out before you might talk to them,the reason I say check them out is because he learned it somewhere and probably at home but I would make an effort.I would sure appreciate someone letting me know if I had a son mistreating a girl.
If it were me, I'd go to the cops.I cannot believe that so called mother thinks its ok her daughter gets hit.How disgusting
have you called the police( non-emergency) to see what can be done maybe they can give you some steps you can take or just any advice period. or even a lawyer to get any advice you can
Check with your local Women's shelter and ask if there is anything they can suggest. Go to your pastor or the local church and ask there. Or if she is attending a church go to hers and tell them. I have been to a shelter because I live in a verbally abusive situation (he is attending anger management) you keep in mind what she is going thru now she also receives at home you can see that in how the mother is responding. Keep telling her she must get out of the situation before he kills her. You hear of this everyday. Most of these women will go back up to 9 times before they get that they can survive without that guy. Keep trying, keep talking, but be gentle and let her know you will always be there for her if she needs you. If you are married you might talk to your husband and let him know of this situation, he might have a suggestion also. I will pray for you and I am proud you care so much. Thank you.
I would call the guidance counselor at school, and set up a meeting with her/him, they will be able to help put you in touch with the right people to help this girl and probably her mom, since she obviously needs help too! You don't say if the girl actually has marks on her and if she doesn't unfortunatly authorities won't do a whole lot with out proof or her being willing to press charges, and you run the risk of making her angry with you and not comming around you so someone can actually keep an eye on her. You can try talking to her straight up and asking her point blank if he is hurting her don't ***** foot around, just ask her, but also make sure that she knows that you are just worrried about her and that you are there for her.She probably really needs someone that she can trust. Maybe you should ask your daughter first and see what she says. Good luck, this is a tough one.
I agree...this is a very very serious situation!!!
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